Thread: A Modern Man's advice for today's Modern Woman

I know that, but this is a cricket!Attachment 29860

Originally Posted by nnuut

I know that, but this is a cricket!Attachment 29860

He also gave the Lucy thread a cricket.

Great, another sausage fest...

This thread will die a horrible death, women know what we think, and frankly they just don't care...

Originally Posted by JTH

Great, another sausage fest...

This thread will die a horrible death, women know what we think, and frankly they just don't care...

It died on the first day it was posted.

Does this thread make me look fat?

Originally Posted by tsptalk

Does this thread make me look fat?

No Dear, you are gorgeous.

Thought for Today

"It's only when you see a mosquito land on your testicles
that you realize that there is always a way to solve
problems without using violence."

Okay...against my better judgment I'll ask a few.

1. If you were fat, would you still wear a thong if your girl asked you to??

2. Who invented the urinal and why? Don't men value their privacy or do they just like to compare? You know kinda like maybe used to establish a "pecking" order.

Distinction between Guts and Balls
There is a subtle distinction between Guts andBalls. We've all heard about men havingGuts or Balls. But do you really knowthe difference?

In an effort to keep you informed, here are thedefinitions:

GUTS - Is arriving home late after a night out with theguys, being met by your wife with a broom, and having the Guts to ask: 'Are youstill cleaning, or are you flying somewhere?'

BALLS - Is coming home late after a night out with theguys, smelling of perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wifeon the butt and having the Balls to say: 'You're next, Chubby.'

I hope this clears up any confusion. Relatively speaking, there is no difference in theoutcome. Both are likely to result in death.

Originally Posted by DreamboatAnnie

Okay...against my better judgment I'll ask a few.

1. If you were fat, would you still wear a thong if your girl asked you to??

2. Who invented the urinal and why? Don't men value their privacy or do they just like to compare? You know kinda like maybe used to establish a "pecking" order.

1. Even skinny, I would not wear a thong.

2. The golden rule (pun intended) is to keep eyes forward, or at each others eye-level. Looking down at anytime other than yourself is a classification manuever that should only be exercised in bath houses, and specific "type" clubs!!!!

Originally Posted by Buster

Thought for Today

"It's only when you see a mosquito land on your testicles
that you realize that there is always a way to solve
problems without using violence."

Another favorite quote of mine is "Opportunity only knocks once."
Seems like a good time to click out and go medieval on that mosquito while the opportunity is there.