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Thread: military pension, alimony and child support legal help

  1. #1

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    Default military pension, alimony and child support legal help

    Calling all you military retirees out there who might know enough to help with information or experience.

    Situation. Career military retiree, 2 school aged children, older one stays with the father, younger one stays with the mother-court decision. Father relocated out of state and far away shortly post-divorce to pursue better job opportunity. very very painful decision for the father, but one he felt necessary.

    Divorce decreed child support for each child, plus alimony for the spouse. allotments taken out of military pension income, sent to the ex-wife for her and the younger child. Military pension office has been sending her the alimony and the child support money for the one child, which was appropriate.

    Here's the kick in the face. The alimony she has been receiving, has been MISlabeled as child support in the military pension payroll records. In addition to the regular child support that has been sent all along. Now an additional allotment is being taken from his pension, to pay alimony that they claim he hasn't been paying. There is nothing left of his pension for him to live on. She is getting every penny now.

    He is working full time trying to support a new household, not making enough to cover basic every day living expenses. My parents have been cashing in savings bonds to keep a roof over his head this winter and to keep him from freezing. He is tired, ill, desperate, literally near death from poverty, when he was the responsible breadwinner loving and caring for his family for over 20 years and doing it with pride, willingly, never ever needing or asking for help.

    The military payroll person he talked to about the allotment mislabeling and overallotments, told him to get a lawyer. Question, is what kind of lawyer, one who knows state divorce laws of the state where the divorce occurred? a lawyer who understands how to navigate the military pension bureaucracy? One who understands both?

    He has an employer who looks at him crosseyed when he takes a personal phone call at work, he can't afford to lose the job, its better paying than anything else he can find in the commuting area where he now lives. He gets home at 7 at night, mentally and physically drained. I want to help him find the legal help he needs, but not sure how to find that help. Insight into the system we're dealing with from someone here would be appreciated far more than you could ever comprehend.

    Please
    PM me if you think you could provide helpful ideas or experience on getting the kind of legal help this situation calls for. Our whole family is at wits end, at a loss and fearful for the future, for him and for his children both. He's headed for total mental and physical collapse very soon. I'm not exaggerating in the least.
    "life can only be understood backwards, but it must be lived forwards" - soren kierkegaard


  2.  
  3. #2

    Default Re: military pension, alimony and child support legal help

    Quote Originally Posted by alevin View Post
    Calling all you military retirees out there who might know enough to help with information or experience.

    Situation. Career military retiree, 2 school aged children, older one stays with the father, younger one stays with the mother-court decision. Father relocated out of state and far away shortly post-divorce to pursue better job opportunity. very very painful decision for the father, but one he felt necessary.

    Divorce decreed child support for each child, plus alimony for the spouse. allotments taken out of military pension income, sent to the ex-wife for her and the younger child. Military pension office has been sending her the alimony and the child support money for the one child, which was appropriate.

    Here's the kick in the face. The alimony she has been receiving, has been MISlabeled as child support in the military pension payroll records. In addition to the regular child support that has been sent all along. Now an additional allotment is being taken from his pension, to pay alimony that they claim he hasn't been paying. There is nothing left of his pension for him to live on. She is getting every penny now.

    He is working full time trying to support a new household, not making enough to cover basic every day living expenses. My parents have been cashing in savings bonds to keep a roof over his head this winter and to keep him from freezing. He is tired, ill, desperate, literally near death from poverty, when he was the responsible breadwinner loving and caring for his family for over 20 years and doing it with pride, willingly, never ever needing or asking for help.

    The military payroll person he talked to about the allotment mislabeling and overallotments, told him to get a lawyer. Question, is what kind of lawyer, one who knows state divorce laws of the state where the divorce occurred? a lawyer who understands how to navigate the military pension bureaucracy? One who understands both?

    He has an employer who looks at him crosseyed when he takes a personal phone call at work, he can't afford to lose the job, its better paying than anything else he can find in the commuting area where he now lives. He gets home at 7 at night, mentally and physically drained. I want to help him find the legal help he needs, but not sure how to find that help. Insight into the system we're dealing with from someone here would be appreciated far more than you could ever comprehend.

    Please
    PM me if you think you could provide helpful ideas or experience on getting the kind of legal help this situation calls for. Our whole family is at wits end, at a loss and fearful for the future, for him and for his children both. He's headed for total mental and physical collapse very soon. I'm not exaggerating in the least.
    i cannot speak to the details of the scenario as you describe, but i can tell you a few secrets of life that are always true regardless of any messed up situation one might find themselves in.

    a, if you act with good heart and intention, do your best to fulfill fair obligations, and keep putting one front in foot of the other no matter the apparent strength of the temporary storm against you, you will end up a good ways down the right path.

    b, most often you will have some say in your destination, unless in the rare moment of emergency circumstance you are called, but you always, repeat always, have a say in how you choose to travel.

    c, if you face difficulty or obstacles, just keep speaking the truth just be the best you you can be, no matter how awkward or the potential of your guilt. own it. it will come around, or sink. either way a solution will present itself. this is a fact i will bet my life on, it always pays off. but when it appears you must be ready to act instantly with no regret, that is where the faith and honesty parts come in.

    d, sort of related matter #1: a friend and coworker tells me today when i get to work 'how do you respond when your ex text messages you out of the blue? "not right now, satan". all the girls laughed.

    e, even less sort of related matter #2: new hire young gal is deciding her choices for fegli, fehb, tsp etc. she is trying to figure out who should be beneficiary and why does she even need one? i say 'because if you don't pick one it will all go to satan. sure, they all start out as angels, but...'

    f, that evolves into a conversation about prenuptiual agreements and 'what, you don't think it'll last forever?' vs. 'i'm a practical man, hell you've seen my credit report, i don't blame you, i'm not in this for the money'.

    tell your brother to walk his path and keep his chin up. good things happen eventually if you do that.
    100g

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  5. #3

    Default Re: military pension, alimony and child support legal help

    Check your PM - I sent you a link that may help. Many years ago I worked for the Los Angeles County Bar Association and we had a Lawyer Referral Service for LA County. I know each State Bar Association has a referral service. Not sure which state your brother is living, so I sent a link for your state. Hope it helps.

    They do refer to lawyers who handle military issues.

    Good Luck.

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  7. #4

    Join Date
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    Default Re: military pension, alimony and child support legal help

    thank you Kathy and burro. I've not had much experience with the legal system, fortunately, much less with military bureaucracy, but I do know about fed civil bureaucracy and slowness to respond even to urgent matters due to understaffing to handle case loads. time is of the essence, things can't continue the way they are much longer. Help is needed, he accepted an attorney referral from a trusted friend for the divorce/custody battle itself, and that attorney was absolutely a dismal failure, we could see it for a long time before things got finalized, but the father is an excessively loyal kind of guy and kept the lawyer he'd been referred until the bitter end. that lawyer is no longer any part of the situation, fortunately, unfortunately after she finished draining his bank account for herself and then some. So absolutely have to make sure we help him find an attorney who understands what we're dealing with and how to break through the bureaucratic layers and the system to get the payroll allotment records corrected asap re past alimony payments. Oh and get the alimony cut off while we're at it. She was only entitled to 2 years, that 2 years expired this spring, but he also needs an attorney to go back to court and get the order issued to end the alimony going forward as well.
    "life can only be understood backwards, but it must be lived forwards" - soren kierkegaard

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  9. #5

    Default Re: military pension, alimony and child support legal help

    Hi- is there a thread for military pension (USNR), and federal pension?
    Anyway, here's my situation:
    1. I am 60 years old. I have 22 years USN Reserve which includes 9 years of active duty. I bought back my military time. I submitted my application for retirement in January, 2019, but as of 6/21/2019, it is still being processed.
    2. I also worked for a federal agency for 32 years (icluding the 9 years military buyback) and applied for federal retirement in April 2019 and also still being processed as of 6/21/2019.
    3. Today, I received an email from OPM asking if I am already receiving military pension. I called her and asked her how does my military pension impact my federal pension? She said both agencies cannot pay for the same time served (I guess she meant the 9 years of active duty that I bought back). I asked her to explain further, but she said she is not that familiar with it. And after she reviews my packet, it will go to the next level who is familiar with this scenario.
    4. Has anybody retired from the "reserve", bought back military time? Was your military pension or federal pension reduced and not as you expected?
    5. A month prior to submitting my retirement applications, I called DFAS ans asked how much I expect to receive for my military pension with 4300 points. I was given a rough estimate of $1000+/-. I also checked my federal agency website regarding my estimated annuity and it showed $1800+/- plus Supplement of $800+/-.

    With the above estimates, I decided it was time to retire. Now, I am not sure since either military or fed annuity might be reduced.

    Anybody with this experience?
    Emotions should never play a role in one's investing strategy!
    No to Greed...No to Fear!
    http://share.robinhood.com/mariloc1

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