Facebook and The Crowley Gallery

[tsptalk]

As some of you know, my wife and I own an art and antiques gallery. It's my wife's baby although I help when I can. She may feel a little inferior about the fact that TSP Talk has thousands of "Likes" on Facebook, and the gallery has only a couple of hundred. Of course its just a local business, but still.

If you have a Facebook account and want to help get that number up for her, I'd appreciate it. I know some of you have already done so.

https://www.facebook.com/TheCrowleyGallery

She's the hardest working person I know (she also has a full-time job with the gov't) but not as tech savvy as she probably wants to be to get online exposure. I won't tell her I requested this. She'll just be happy that the number is up a little.

Thanks!

[burrocrat]

maybe this is completely off base and given my track record i'm probably the least qualified to comment, but... that is some dangerous ground you're treading i think, with more potentential negative outcomes than positive.

we know what you meant to say tom "my wife is awesome and runs this cool gallery, she works hard and pours her heart and soul into it, i'm so proud of her, check it out (link), and don't be afraid to leave some feedback."

but we all know the female ear is much more finely tuned than our's, and this is what she may hear:

'she's feeling inadequate' (try 'our online marketing is not as succesful as we would like'). 'it's just a local business' (try 'she is a tireless entrepeneur in our community'). 'help get that number up for her, i'd appreciate it' (try check out her site and let her know what you think of her work'). and danger will robinson 'i won't tell her i requested this' (uh, there's no good way to spin that one, you guys are married, she should be the first person you tell everything and the only person you tell some things).

a little analogy: you two are getting ready to go to a dinner party and she asks you the proverbial 'does this dress make me look big'? doesn't matter if it does or not, she's just cueing you that she needs your attention. when you get to the party you whisper to all your friends 'tell my wife she looks great tonight, she's feeling a little down.' so your wife walks around all evening just beaming from all the compliments feeling like a princess. then two weeks later one of the guys slips up when his wife is hounding him how a particular dress looks on her and he makes a crack like 'what, do i need to get my friends to tell you you look nice?' and then it all comes tumbling out of the closet. it doesn't matter that your wife really did rock that dress, she will only question why you made her the butt of the joke that evening with the whole forced compliment routine, and will probably not wear that dress ever again. but she will keep it in the wardrobe and pull it out and glare at it whenever she is mad at you.

everybody likes to feel appreciated, nobody likes questioning if the compliments were real.

if i were you i would immediately run down to city center and get her a big bouquet of flowers and some expensive chocolate and tell her the whole story before she figures it out on her own. no wait, after the chocolate i'd do a few things around the house for her and the take her out for lunch at a really nice place. then a slow walk through the fall leaves, preferably somewhere in public. then i'd tell her. hopefully there will be enough people around that she is less inclined to slap you and start crying. maybe she will calm down some by the time you get home. maybe.

you said so yourself, she is a smart lady, she will find out where the surge of new likes came from, better just take the bull by the horns and get it over with.

perhaps some of the female tsptalkers could shed a little light on this subject.

[nnuut]

Are you saying this is a Damned if you do Situation, or a Damned if you do/Damned if you Don't Situation?

[Boxholder]

Tom....spent a little time on your Gallery site this morning...very impressed. If we are ever out that way we'll be sure to come by and visit. Don't know about Burro's advice....would love to see his track record of experiences....sounds like he may have been married at least 8 or 10 times.

[tsptalk]

Don't worry, my wife never reads this board. She has someone handle her TSP for her. And I think that's enough about her. She's a toughie and can handle it, but thanks for your concern burro. (I'm screwed, aren't I?)

[burrocrat]

...sounds like he may have been married at least 8 or 10 times.

no, just once. but it seemed like an eternity.

[alevin]

Gotta say, Tom, I think b's right on the mark on how she'd take it, and on damage control too.