Thread: Screwy News

Police: Man Said He Showed Meijer Workers Nude Selfies Because It Cheered Him Up

Taylor Swift buys up porn domain names | Fox News

Taylor Swift went shopping, and she bought all the porn domains with her name. Her recent purchases aren’t as out of the blue as one might think, however. And no, she’s not considering any sort of professional career change.

dang. now why didn't i think of that?

that would've been way better than inventing some plastic gizmo to sell on late night tv and the internet for 3 easy payments of $19.99. plus i could've got a chance to meet my future sugar mama and, uhhh, negotiate a price.

Car insurance is cheaper if you're married, new study shows

Twenty-year-old men pay 22% more on auto insurance than twenty-year-old women for the same coverage

we cannot racially profile hispanics when enforcing undocumented guest immigration laws along the mexico border. and we cannot discriminate against women in the workplace by paying them less in the same position than a male colleague regardless of individual performance. and bakeries cannot refuse to make a weddimg cake for a same sex couple anymore. so how come insurance companies are allowed to profit from gender inequality financial terrorism against young males? if we are all the same, we should all pay the same for the same benefits and services. it is time to end the rule of the 1% now.

This nut-chewing habit is linked to thousands of deaths | Fox News

Free screenings and other programs helped cut men's chewing rates in half two years ago, the BBC notes.

this is one of those times where i am thankful i don't have a nut chewing habit. plus it makes it easier to hire a baker or reserve a florist.

School worker arrested after barricading in the classroom, stripping naked in front of children | Fox News Latino

A 31-year-old after-school assistant was facing felony charges of child endangerment and false imprisonment Friday after barricading herself and students inside a Lemon Grove classroom and then taking off her clothes as she struggled with school staff who came to the children’s rescue.

oh man, how come my teachers never did that?

Couple Arrested for Selling “Tickets to Heaven” | CelebTriCity

Tito and Amanda Watts were arrested over the weekend for selling “golden tickets to heaven” to hundreds of people. The couple, who sold the tickets on the street for $99.99 per ticket, told buyers the tickets were made from solid gold and each ticket reserved the buyer a spot in heaven — simply present the ticket at the pearly gates and you’re in.

if it was that easy why did jesus spend 3 days in a tomb? save your $100 bucks kids.

Those 2 are crack(ed)pots-literally. wonder if everyone they sold to was also high on crack.

Bloomberg Business

Attachment 33257

The U.S. economy looks set to come out of its soft patch just as the labor market entered one of its own.

ok, that is enough. twice now in the last couple months, when the market starts to tank, bloomberg posts a story about how good the economy is with pictures of folks in plastic suits who got jobs handling wieners. this time it is two chicks tossing wieners into boiling water, last time it was 4 dudes sticking wieners in buns. from the same factory! two months apart!

now i may be dutch, but i'm not dumb. really michael? wieners? a soft patch? again?

the market is rigged, and it is going down hard. i can read the signs.

Grilled cheese lovers have more sex, study says | Fox News

Not only do grilled cheese lovers have more sex, they also have bigger hearts and are more adventurous, the study discovered.

i think i am going to start making grilled cheese more often. i used to do it a lot when i was younger, so i think there may be some truth to this study. but i already have a big heart and am plenty adventurous, so i hope most of the benefits go straight to the sex department.

Authorities say a south Georgia man shot an armadillo, but ended up accidentally wounding his mother-in-law when the bullet ricocheted off the mammal known for its hard shell.

Georgia man kills armadillo, but ricochet gunshot hits mother-in-law - CBS News

Some insensitive men might call this a two-fer.

Originally Posted by Warrenlm

Georgia man kills armadillo, but ricochet gunshot hits mother-in-law - CBS News

Some insensitive men might call this a two-fer.

two-fer.